Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2006

So I just caught the re-air of VS's 2006 show and I have a few comments. I will first and foremost state that I absolove people strutting their stuff on a runway. I find it to be one of the best things in life; to watch a model slam down a runway with a fierce look of superiority and contempt for all the ugly people while staying on beat with the music is quite possibly heaven. That's why as a gay man, I like to watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show every year. Oh, that and I love that they use the Olympics real motion glide cams that follow the models from the floor up. It's way hot.

Now, I like the beautiful people just as much as the next guy but I do not ever want to see them talk or even show one ounce of personality again. Is that sexist? Does that count if I'm gay? Who can tell. Seriously though, watching Adriana Lima try to speak is like listening to a robot from 1980 try to translate code. It's harsh. It's not sexy at all. Straight men must fast forward through all that stuff. They Sookie it. I did too boys, I did too. Shut your hole and walk that tight little ass down that runway and look void of emotion! That's what I'm here to see.

I'm not here to see rat face Gisele talk about her first and only love. I'm not here to see these nameless size zeros make cute faces. Cute faces are not for the runway, their for print ads. Go work at JC Penney's if you want to be cute... the runway is for ruthless bitches and I've got no time for pleasant. Hips, Hips, Slam, Slam.

That being said... Adriana Lima, Karolina Kurova, Alessandra Ambrosia, and Selita Ebanks can walk the shit out of a runway! Amazing to watch these girls slam through all that glitter and the glass shards. Hot!

Um, also hot. JT. Justin Timberlake is one sexy mutha! He has indeed brought the SexyBack. Sorry Scooter, I really do think this honor goes to JT and not you. I do see these shackles and yes honey I am your slave...