Lost "Three Minutes" of the Worst Writing Ever...

As you know I am a huge fan of "Lost" I may not always write about it, I may not always agree with what they are doing on the show but basically I am still lost in "Lost." There are many things I can forgive on this show because I actually trust that they have a vision - but this week came a moment and a line that was so inexcusably horrible it deserves a Razzie.

It came with only a minute to spare, the sailboat was about to be spotted but before that, Hurley was giving his eulogy of Libby. I loved that he said "She was a psychologist... or a psychiatrist..." who can tell the diff big man? Who? It was funny and touching but then in the middle of his speech he turns around to Michael and says "I'm coming with you..." then spins his big fat head back around and continues his eulogy.

Seriously Damon and Carlton? That was so so cheesy and lame. Like any person would ever stop midsentence, turn to someone they hardly know who wants them to go to battle with a scary pack of theatre geeks armed with spears, guns, and a monster between them to find his son, not your, his and be like okay, I'll die for you? Hurley knew Libby for like 20 days, I'm not saying he didn't fall for her I'm just saying who would risk it?

And why oh why would they choose that moment in honoring the dead loved one to interrupt? It's not like he had another hour of sermon to go through, he said like 4 more words and was done - he could have waited 4 words before his fake bravado and honor decided to shine through.

I don't know, it bugged me. It was out of character and horribly placed. Period.

Also bugging me... still - Michael. I really just wish they would kill him already. We don't care! Does anyone care? Email me if you do, but I don't think anyone will. Unless Harold P. is reading this himself and takes offense to my comments. Harold, loved you in a wheelchair, trapped in a plexiglass cube and naked in the shower but on "Lost" I seriously despise your character, your acting, everything. I want your character Michael to just die already. You're so pointless. You were gone for like 10 episodes and no complaints here. No complaints on the island, half the folks forgot you even left on that pilgrimage of yours.

And another complaint - you did not need to be an Iraqi Soldier to see through Michael's lies. He's the worst liar ever! He's not said 2 words to Hurley since they crashed on that island and everyone's supposed to believe he wants Hurley to come along? He weighs as much as the island, he's not gonna be fast or sly in that jungle. He's gonna be slow, sweaty, and clomping around. I expected better of Jack, Kate, Sawyer, and Hugo. Thank god Sayid is there otherwise they'd all just trapse off into the wild willy nilly with a trigger happy bad acting thinly guised liar leading their way. All I'm sayin'...

As always with the bad came the good. My Favorite Moment of the Night? Locke just cuts off his splints and walks away. He just willed it so. He sat there until the island was ready for him to walk again and he did. I love John Locke! He's amazing.

Also amazing is Miss Cleo! "Hello I am Miss Cleo Darling!" Miss Clue's one sassy gal. She starts right in with the creepy Walt questions. How old was he when he began speaking? Has he ever had any illnesses? Has Walt ever appeared somewhere he wasn't supposed to be? Miss Cleo, I thought you were a psychic! Those tests you're making Walt take aren't working? Give him that Project Christmas test from "Alias" - see what he comes up with.

I also like that The Others go through all the trouble of setting up a fake camp for Michael to see and eventually lead them back to. I like that they think that far in advance because you know there is not a chance in hell they would really let someone see where they live.

And I don't know about you, but I'd be worrying about that Alex chick if I were Zeke. She's already freed Claire and now she's backing out on duties because she's trying to ask questions of the one they have in captivity? Oh hell no, kick that French woman's daughter to the curb - or the jungle equivalent of a curb.

I like that Eko remains so damn wierd and funny. Charlie asks what he's supposed to do now that Eko has decided his fate is to live in the hatch. Eko's response? "Get my things" He don't care. He sat there and talked with Michael knowing full well that Michael probably had something to do in killing Ana Lucia and Libby , washed a floor and went on with his day. He don't care!

A show of hands for all those that would like to see "the room" that Miss Cleo puts Walt in when he' bad? Hands? I pray its some torture room!

And lastly...

"Boat... Boat!"


  • Ducky, how dare you criticize our masterpiece of words? You try writing 22 episodes a year with this much backstory and theology and see if you don't skip a beat!

    We agree though, we've been trying to kill Michael since Season 1 but JJ keeps fighting it.

    By Anonymous Carlton and Damon, at 5/19/2006 10:35:00 AM  

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