So You Think You Can Dance
Results Show
Jun 29, 2006

Again, the group dance at the beginning of the show is some of the best dancing we've ever seen on this show. It's quick, fresh, free of personality tics, and this week featured the gayest move in SYTYCD history; one that if Benji's Mormon clan was watching set them to get lynchin' materials (why are the Mormon's a bunch of KKK members in my head? I don't know):

All I'm saying is that you know originally this portion of the dance was supposed to have Ivan be the Top or the Bottom then his Dad called to reconcile and wish him well (for not being what I can only imagine in his eyes was a "nancy dancy boy") so all the sudden they were like: "Well, can't ruin that relationship again... already" so they threw Travis or Benji in or something.

However it went down, it was a crazy great move and kinda hot... a replay moment for sure. As of 7:30am I couldn't find any video from last nights performance so you can't go viral on it yet. I'll keep my eyes peeled for some asses to elbows, face to crotch flip action!


Our Bottom 3 Couples America:
Pre--Pre-Op Alexis Arquette and Attitude Ashlee
Jessica and Jaymz
Dmirtry and Aleksandra


Dancing For Their Lives:
First up was Ashlee and my only thought was which Drag Queen Magician/Fabuloso Lab Techician did she steal all of these damn sparkly long coats from? They are to quote the girls from Popular, "heinous"; luckily her routine was kick ass! I love that there was a whole shout-out reference to the choreography smack down: "That's real poppin'... Electric Boogaloos" or whatevs. Lady Shiva was throwing down!

Next up, not long for this world Pre-Pre-Op Alexis Arquette who pulled no pimp face and apparently no talent out for this routine. It was a mess but to my untrained eyes still of technical merit.

Jessica... who if I'm being completely honest I cannot hear her name without thinking of the MadTV sketches where they spoof Laguna. When Cat says "Jissika" all I can think of is this (if you don't want to watch the whole thing, skip to the 3 minute mark):



Now I love that Jessica had to let us know that really, deep down inside she's a fun free spirit... she is after all Cuban/Italian and from Miami. All the sudden she was Ivette from Big Brother 6.


Jaymz got up and slipped twice then fell off the fucking stage... this was all before he got choked up talking to the judges and began crying. It was all out of control and too spinny. Jon asked if he had his head stuck in a door.

Outer Spacecadet Aleksandra's hair y'all? What the hell is in it? All I could think was that the makeup man came in her hair, threw some glitter in it and told her it would be reminescent of Something About Mary... a real show stopper! Um, gross. Then I was let down, I think it was just staples. Imagine the poor intern that had to sit there for 2 hours stapling that idiots hair together?

Dmitry - Sir, I don't care for your face but if you keep dancing with that shirt undone and doing backbends that show your penis I'll keep voting! Hello!


Next up Natasha Bedingfield sang which I was dreading - then I realized that she's maybe not as poppy and cheesy in real life as that shitty song "unwritten". I remember thinking that she was a fierce bitch when her first song "i love you i love you i love you..." came out. Like she stepped out of the London streets as some white rapper chick who's got crazy street cred and this is what she's forced to perform. Her song tonight seemed like that as well. Maybe that "unwritten" isn't representative of who she is as an artist?


Results:
At least Nigel apologized before giving Outer Spacecadet Aleks the boot! Very gentlemanly of him, make nice before giving her the ballet slipper home - officially ending her dance career once and for all. No shocker here, Pre-Pre-Op Alexis Arquette is going home as well. I'll miss his bitchy aloof manner come next week.

If Dmitry thought he had it hard with the two untrained partners he's sent packin' wait until he gets the way untrained in anything other than Poppin' and Lockin' Ashlee. Good lucky Chesty! Let's see that pic again!

That's hot!